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7/23/2007

The Sad Day


It's official -- my baby is in Kindergarten. Yesterday was sort of a surreal day for me as I got all of her stuff ready. I was putting Sadie down when I realized that I was entering a whole new phase of my life -- the school phase. No more sleeping in and having lazy mornings. What happened to my baby? It was a hard night for all of us. Ellie couldn't even eat dinner because of the butterflies in her stomach. We even tried to get her to eat ice cream and that didn't work. Dustin gave her a beautiful blessing and that calmed her down for a little bit, but the nerves were definitely setting in. She did manage to fall asleep before 9, luckily.

This morning I woke her up at 6:45 and she wouldn't even eat breakfast because she was so nervous. It just about broke my heart. She was brave all the way to school until we turned the corner to the Kindergarten line up and then she broke down crying. Her teacher was coming out right then, so her teacher ran over to hug her and tell her how much fun it was going to be, but even that didn't help.

We went and stood in line and I tried to get her to talk to some of the kids she knew, but that didn't help. She kept crying and telling me she wanted to go home with me. I was trying so hard to be brave for her, but I wanted to take her home too! Finally the lines started going in and hers was the last one, so the crowd had thinned out, but Ellie was still sobbing. Then a little girl from her class came over and gave her a hug and held her hand. he next thing I knew, Ellie was walking off to Kindergarten holding hands and not even looking back at me. And then I broke down bawling like a baby. In fact I'm crying right now thinking about it.



I can't believe my little girl is gone all day. I miss her already. I keep finding myself looking at the clock wondering how long until she comes home. I started the count down at 6 hours. It's like a little piece of my heart walked out the door. I'm not ready for all the worry that comes with letting my little girl out into the big world without me.

16 comments:

laura said...

awww - that crying picture is so sad!!!! but then look at her with her little friend. how SWEET! (((hugs))) mom - she will be fine, and so will you!

Anonymous said...

oh my goodness. i am sobbing. i'm not ready to let her go to kindergarten either. i'm about to call you. oh my word. what a sad day. i love you.

-lola

Anonymous said...

That picture of her crying makes ME cry! OMG! That is one heartbreaking look.

Just tell her she looks fierce in her new red shoes and that should solve everything. Her backpack is a big as she is. What on earth is in there?

I remember the first day of kindergarden like it was last week. Next thing you know, and I'm not kidding, blink and they are at high school graduation. It flies by. Really freakishly fast.

What a big day. She's very brave. And so are you mama!

Anonymous said...

Way to break a Grandma's heart. Where would we all be without a great friend to hold our hand during difficult challenges. I love the red shoes, I want a pair! One very special shirt for Friday is in todays mail. Hope it works.
Love,
Cheryl

Anonymous said...

Ellie, I remember your mommy's first day of kindergarten -- and you remind me so much of her. It's really hard to let your baby go off into the big bad world, but I think her Mommy and Daddy have prepared her pretty darn well! She's smart, funny and self confident! No one will ever get in her way! Soar Ellie -- Grandma and Papa love you and are so proud of you!

Unknown said...

Oh, crap. I was fine with my baby going off to Kindergaarten today until I read this. :(

I'm glad she had a friend to help her out. I bet tomorrow will be much smoother. :)

Laurel and Trev said...

Oh Maddy...you even made ME cry. It's a constant struggle of needing to let them go and yet wanting to keep them tight within your arms. It's so hard. Big hugs...today was a big day.

She looks absolutely adorable in her "first day of school outfit". You've got a beautiful little girl.

And I can't believe you start school there in July...I've never heard of that before. It feels like we just started our summer holidays here. I don't even want to think about sending them back yet ;).

Michelle said...

awww maddy. I'm so sorry. Not that it was all that long ago, but I remember Noah's first day too. I was a wreck. Thing was, I didn't really expect to be (why I thought that I'm not sure) so I really didn't know what was going on in myhead. Remember me freaking out on 2peas about the teacher - about nothing??? It's funny now (well kinda funny lol)

It DOES get better. I promise. But it might take like 2 weeks :) Don't rush it.

Casey said...

Okay so I'm almost crying now. What a sweet memory to tell her in 10 years. I'm in denial about my kids growing up. They won't. Nope.

Janel said...

OH wow that is a sad little face, I'd be dying if I saw that too!! I have to say I'm a bit surprised because Ellie is such a confident little girl, but you did the right thing. How precious is that little blond girl, that is just too much!! I hate to tell ya, it dosen't get much easier with the other kids. A little, but not much. But you DID IT!! :D

p.s. I love the awesome comments on your blog, your friends are so funny!!

The Tyler's said...

That really makes me so sad. Brings back memories of back when!! I'm glad I have a couple more years till I have to start all that.

Ammon said...

I use to think that I would be pushing Carly out the door to go to school, but after reading your post, and tears welling up in my eyes, I'm not ready either! Wait, can't they go to school when their like, I don't know...20? Maybe I'll be more prepared by then.

Kerry said...

That first day is the hardest. On mom! You described everything I did on Megan's first day, watching the clock and everything. Oh wow, this brings back so many memories.

She looks adorable.

Anonymous said...

Awwwwwwww Maddy! I remember Bailee's first day like it was yesterday! She didn't cry at all....I was the one bawling like a baby! Glad that big day is over and it will get easier!

Anonymous said...

You made ME cry with your emotion! Change is never easy, but that is all part of the progress of life, right?
I'm proud of you for a) taking photos . . . and the one of the 2 girls walking away is great, btw!! I wish I had photos from my kindergarten experience.
b) making a blog entry for posterity . . . you go girl!
You'll be amazed, in 2 months, when she'll be old hat at this school thing!
Kaelene

Shauna-Lou said...

Ok Maddy, my heart is in my throat now! The kids are as cute as ever, and Ellie looks like such a big girl with her back pack! Give Nate a hug from me, and tell him to get better!
Sadie is taking after Ellie with all the growing up she's done!
Lots of love!
SL & CJ